I wrestle with my faith as if it were a seesaw. Sometimes it is up and happy and other times it is very low down and weary. It dazzles me that the pendulum could swing so drastically toward both poles. Why is that? How can that be? Is this battle strictly inside of me or are there other elements and forces at play?
Being aware of scripture I know what the Bible tells us about this scenario. Ephesians 6 tells us that we wrestle not with just flesh and blood but against rulers and powers from the dark side of the spiritual kingdom. The NIV Bible translation, it says it this way. “Our fight is not against human beings. It is against the rulers, the authorities and the powers of this dark world. It is against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly world.” Although I know these things, and yet I still wrestle. So what am I to think of this when I cannot even control my own being?
What does our Lord tell us to do? He was here and experienced these things in mortal flesh just as we are going through similar things. He tells us not to worry about things that are not within our control but to lean upon Him to cover us. He tells us to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all those other things will be handled for us. As He struggled with the cup He knew He would have to drink of regarding the crucifixion… He cried out to His Father seeking if there was any way that this cup could be removed. And then He said, but if not, thy will be done. He would accept the Father’s will above what His flesh was crying out. Though He was fully man and fully God, even He seemed to have wrestled with this human flesh as we do.
In the book of Job, we read about such deep and unheard-of sufferings beyond what seems to be humanly bearable. From the scriptural passages, we see how Job survived and even prospered afterward. So what do I make of my petty problems and issues? Worry does me no good nor does it provide any relief. On the contrary, it only seems to dig an even deeper hole and causes more confusion. Should I clammer down and try to endure the pain even if it might only be imagined? Though the temporary pain may be only in our minds, it still seems to exercise much control over our entire beings, especially over our souls and spirits. Therefore, even during my weeping and moaning I know God is there with me regardless of what this mortal mind wants me to otherwise believe.
So… my Father, my dear Lord, and Savior, I come to You seeking Your guidance, Your grace, and tender mercy. Although I don’t deserve it, You told me to ask. I thank You for being my Lord, Savior, and heavenly Father. Thank You for what You have done, are doing, and what You will continue to do for me, (us) here until eternity. Let Your divine will be done in me, through me, for me, and more specifically by You. I pray this in the mighty and majestic name of my Lord and Savior Christ Jesus, Selah!